Today we are re-releasing the tragedy of Kurt Cobain & Courtney Love. Farz will take us into the murky depths of the American North West to tell the tale of an entirely new genre of music that defined a generation. Wrap your flannel around your waist and grab a cup of coffee, we're going from the beginning of Grunge and the end of an icon.
Today we are re-releasing the tragedy of Kurt Cobain & Courtney Love. Farz will take us into the murky depths of the American North West to tell the tale of an entirely new genre of music that defined a generation. Wrap your flannel around your waist and grab a cup of coffee, we're going from the beginning of Grunge and the end of an icon.
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Hi Friends! Our transcripts aren't perfect, but I wanted to make sure you had something - if you'd like an edited transcript, I'd be happy to prioritize one for you - please email doomedtofailpod@gmail.com - Thanks! - Taylor
hi friends happy holidays today we are re-releasing episode 11 part two on Kurt
Cobain and Courtney Love It is a classic doomed to fail relationship it was never
going to work but they were happy for a little bit and we talk about that in the show and we talk a little bit about what
happened to Kurt and how sad every pre-teen in America was for for a while
if you have any ideas or questions or things you want to tell us please reach out we love it we're at Doom toil POD at
gmail.com and on all the socials at Doom toil pod please enjoy this episode and a
matter of the people of State of California versus orthal James Simpson case number ba09 and so my fellow
Americans and not what your country can do for you ask what you can do for your
[Music] country so okay well I'll make you
transition over to the ever shifting premise of the show which should be true
crime but in my case is actually not true crime so oh great there we go we'll makes it up we'll mix it up to this week
episode 11 new show exactly so well I started out researching uh I
was gonna do Michael Alig do you know who that is no I W look it up so you can
do it later or tell me yeah no I I'll just tell you I I don't think I'm going to do it now but I I started doing that
because so Michael Alig is part of the club kids scene that was part of this New York club you you recognize this I
take it from your is m kulin in the monster party monster yeah yeah that's
exactly it it's it's party monster is the dramatized version of Michael Alec
the only really famous one that people would recognize now as rup Paul was part of them um and Michael Al ended up killing somebody and going to jail for a
long time he got released and he died actually recently um but whatever I have um I have been to Limelight that club
what's it like it's it was cool cool I mean I think it's closed I mean it closed a long time ago but um it's in
it's in an old church which is cool you know yeah I think our former employer threw a party there actually for a book
release maybe yeah um so I started I started watching party monster this week
because I was like I'm gonna do Michael Alig and so I should probably reference the movie and in the movie Marilyn
Manson's in it and he he basically plays Courtney Love is the only way I can
describe it just like this like totally insane druggy junky whatever and I was
like you know what I got a better idea for this week so again the story this
week is not going to be true crime in nature but it's going to definitely hit on the red flaggy parts of the show's
premise so I've already given enough to indicate what I'm going to be talking about but I'm still going to pretend like I haven't and just read the
outline so um I'll start by saying that this is a rock and roll story obviously and because there's it's a rock and roll
story there's going to be a lot of legacy building and so because of that people are going to have a ton of feelings and passion about like what I'm
going to be discussing here today but because there's a lot of Legacy building there's a lot of conflicting stories out
there in terms of when things happened who was there when it happened everybody wants to be a part of the story which is
I think a common human phenomenon when certain famous people pass outside of
like pure facts there's a bit of speculation here and by pure facts I mean location manner time of death
things like that things that can be like scient ific Al proven by objective third parties outside of that it's like a lot
of just junkies telling stories to each other basically you're you're rock and roll guy so I feel like you're the guy
the guy to tell the story am I a rock and roll guy no I'm just kidding thank you so obviously today we're talking
grunge which means we're talking Nirvana and Kirk Cobain and Courtney Love which
is like one of the most probably red flaggy relationships that's ever existed in human history when Nirvana was at its
peak and Kurt ultimately died I was not of an age where I cared about these things like I think he died when I was
around 9 years old so I was I I don't know I was doing what nine-year-olds do I don't know exactly what that would be
probably like you know caring about dinosaurs Power Rangers things like that not hardcore grunge rock my brother was
though my brother would have been 14 so I remember going to whatever store
probably version version stores and like him buying the uh never mind album CD in
like the was like in like the tall CD boxes yeah yeah I remember my mom asking the guy at the store like what's Nirvana
and he was like something that happens when you get like your tooth pulled or something he just say something weird to her was he trying to be funny I think so
I think so oh I guess yeah I guess they gas you so yeah so at that time I never really like I didn't understand the
ramification of this I was just not of that not of that age group but it's weird I got so much more exposure to it
and you accidentally got some exposure to it as well so Kurt was raised in
Aberdine which oh yes yeah I've been through there because my my ex's
father's family was from ham and so we'd go there and visit quite a bit and because you came my wedding you've also
been through Aberdine Taylor I think I have and I remember being there and being like this place is so [ __ ]
depressing I can absolutely see why you would create Grunge music here yeah like that's
yeah I actually put down here I'm like I doubt any of your stroll through aine
was actually memorable but it sounds like it was because it is exactly what you described it as because I knew I
knew where I was you know I think I was like you know it was like trailer parks and yeah yeah wet rained it rain there
yeah yeah it's a so it's on a it's on a bay it had to be because it was actually
a logging town so ships would come in collect the the Timber and then put them
on boats and go wherever they're going so it's no coincidence that in the late ' 80s and early '90s exactly when Kurt's
coming up logging had become a much less viable industry in the area simply because they tapped that resource
completely there there was nothing left to mine for there essentially so the town geographically is lovely because it
is on this Bay it is the Pacific Northwest it's Lush it's green look Olympic Olympic National Forest is like
maybe 20 minutes from from here I mean I you know and that is one of the most beautiful tranquil places that exists in
the United States and aine's like right outside of that but given the fact that
they tapped this mining resource completely this U Timber resource completely it the area is just economically depressed like to your
point it's just like a blown out town like it just you know I when when I
would be there I didn't want to like talk badly about it obviously yeah
because of like family connections but I was yeah I just I was like every here has to be doing meth like you you look
at that town and you're like of course everybody hears on drugs like what else is there to do there's nothing else here ex yeah so that's where Kurt was raised
so what one thing that I actually found really really lovely about Aberdine despite everything I literally just said
about it is that one of my favorite NaNa songs like everybody's favorite NaNa songs is come as you are and there's a
welcome sign when you get into aine says welcome to Aberdine come as you are which I thought was lovely that was very
sweet so going back to the main character Kurt was born in 1967 and I would describe his childhood as
accurately reflected in his music not that he wrote about his childhood at all but then when I think about Nirvana I
think of teenage angst really like it's just angsty music that was what it sounds like his childhood was his
parents were divorced he was a mad kid he was aimless the parents were remarried the stepparents sucked there
was domestic violence substance abuse it sounds like the divorce was a huge triggering factor for
him like he talks about it over and over and over again in later later in his life like he thought he had this idyllic
family or he would have this idyllic family and that divorce really seemed to have been like the thing that put him in
this head the Mind space of just being like an angsty teenager essentially so
all the factors basically existed that would produce a guy like Kurt would eventually become some of the stories I
read about him seem like just great indicators of his eventual personality his parents would sign him up for little
league and he would intentionally strike out so he just wouldn't have to play he he was apparently like a pretty good
wrestler and he hated it he hated being good at wrestling he just wanted to like rebel against everything totally when he
was in high school he refriended like the gay kid in school because when everyone thought he was gay they would
leave him alone because they didn't want to I mean you we remember what that was like back when we were in yeah like that
was the whole thing he would spray paint goddess gay on cars like he was just yeah he was just like very
anti-establishment I found this picture of him when he was 14 he was in some school band and the
other kids around him he's like sitting on these risers and these other kids are so happy and they're having fun and
they're like the kids are having a good time he looks like he wants to strangle the drum that in front of him like he
hates it so much because it's just anything that has to do with normaly yeah him it seemed like at least
yeah so he'd eventually drop out of school and live this like Vagabond
lifesty just sleeping on Friends couches he started doing his own myth building saying he like slept under this bridge
everybody said you couldn't sleep under that bridge because the water would just keep coming and it would just wash you away he was occasionally homeless he
would yeah he would meet girls and just shack up with them for a while and it sounds like he mostly just carried on
these relationships for the sake of having a place to stay um and then these
women telling him to like get a job and he just would refuse to do so he forms one band early on called feal matter
which was very short-lived and then he went on to form nirvana in
1987 one of the things I learned here had to do with Dave Gro who I didn't
know this but he was not the original drummer of Nirvana he wasn't who was so
it's this guy named Chad Channing M so their first album ever released so the
big the big one was never mind but the first album was called bleach and that was recorded with a drummer named Chad
Channing and I really hate what happened to this guy because yeah band people move around and people get fir all time
but he was so briefly tied to one of the most influential bands in the world and at that time he wouldn't obviously know
that and now really nobody knows who he is like you literally just ask me like who is he everybody knows Dave Gro but
nobody knows Chad M there was there wasn't there like a beetle too like a guy who was in The
Beatles that got left before they became famous I don't know that like that always happens there was definitely a
guy a guy who was supposed to be in BTS and then like got kicked out at the very end and he was like he's like now he's
just like a regular guy and he's like I miss my friends but like Superstars yeah
like it's got of it's got of I mean I don't know bts's history maybe they he knew was going to be really big at that time but like in this case like nobody
knew niron was going to be what it is it's like you missed out you missed that show apparently in 2013 Nirvana that was
the year Nirvana got inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this guy Chad thought he would be in that group but
apparently they only included Kurt the guitarist this guy named Christ and Dave GRL and like listen I I actually like
I'm gonna go into a little bit of a rant about Dave gr here I love him so much and he's even cooler than I thought he
made a point to shout out Dave in 2013 for his contribution to Nirvana and to bleach he like referenced how he wrote
some of the later riffs that they used and he really wanted to make sure that people knew that this guy was a part of
the band even though he wasn't called out in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame so my sign note about Dave Gro so obviously
went on to found Foo Fighters which became a phenomenally successful band in its own right he apparently is also a
pitmas these days and regularly feeds the homeless of LA with his barbecue I
saw a picture of him doing that recently yes yeah yeah he did he did that recently but he does it regularly apparently I also watched an interview
he did with Howard Stern and I wanted to reach through my monitor and punch
Howard Stern for just how shitty he is to Dave Gro like he Dave Gro handled
this with such class but at one point because to us Kirk Cain is just like this what who he killed himself like it
is what it is right like we don't like I I have no emotional attachment to the guy but Dave Gro was like his childhood
friend and like band like they traveled the world together and like like they were very very closely tied and Howard
would just say stuff about Kurt's death in just just like flippant manner to Dave gr that was just really really
offing like he was like he was like oh so wasn't it kind of great that he killed himself because it gave you this opportunity to move on and do food
Fighters it was just like was my friend yeah like Dave just like um no that's
not a good thing like you know he just handled it very class in a classy way
which was really cool to see so anyways side rant about Dave Gro so in 1991 that
was like I said before that was kind of their breakout year that was the year that they released never mind and I didn't know this but apparently Nirvana
pushing Seattle grunge is partially the reason why bands like Pearl Jam sound
gard and Allison Chains Rose in popularity as well like they invented this genre and then everybody's like
addicted to it now so Kurt by extension basically becomes the ambassador of this genre
that also happens to be the most popular genre of music at the time it sounds like he would hate that okay exactly so
so I I put this down think about this in modern terms I don't actually know who this guy is now I wrote down maybe it's
Drake maybe it's Justin Bieber maybe it's Beyonce I don't really know like is who who is it do you know I mean I don't
know I can't think of anyone who like started a new genre of music I mean I
don't know I'm talking about music but like I feel like there's people who are really popular but like all the people
you just named they're pop stars you know like I don't know like I haven't I don't know I don't know anything new but
I'm also not like in the no but but grunge was like new so this is even bigger than that then so it's even
bigger than like a drake because it's yeah it's all new so imagine that so
imagine like imagine a guy like Kurt who wants to rebel against everything
establishment and now he is this Figure Head in Corporate America yeah yeah I'm
I'm GNA actually get into this like a lot when I get to like the suicide note but like he does not handle this well in
his own mind I will say that if Kurt didn't have this self-destruct component
to him he actually would have been the exact right guy for this I watched an
interview with him and his lack of caring about anything is so
quintessentially rock starish you should see you should watch like I mean even like the way he pres you watch like rock
stars now and like I think like like I don't really know rock stars whatever like is Bono a rockstar sure I mean he's
like really old but yes sure like but even like younger Bano like you look at like how he presents himself you look at
how Kurt presents himself doesn't give a [ __ ] like he's wearing like shoes that the souls are falling off of his jeans
are just shredded and tattered like not because he's trying to look cool he literally just does not care his
bandmates had reported this is this this is like a self-reflection on how little he cares his band mates had reported
that the melody mattered way more to kurk than the lyrics so he'd always come up
with the melody and then attach lyrics to it so it's funny because people would
dissect every word he said and in one interview in one interview someone asked
if it's hard coming up with ideas and he goes this is a quote he goes at one point I was just using poetry and just
like garbage that would spew out of me and a lot of times when I write lyrics it's in the last minute because I'm
really lazy and then I find myself having to come with an explanation for it like he just didn't care like he was just like okay I guess this fits that
lyric or the that Melody but I think I think like I feel like your original question was like how his personality a
different personality like would have like enjoy the fame but then I feel like
then the music would have been different like you could have been a different person yeah you can't have one the other yeah yeah that's a good point so Kurt
was quoted as saying when you're in the public eye okay he's he kind he's a little bit melodrama itic he's a little
bit M dramatic I think we could agree on that we can agree on that so this is a quote when you're in the public eye you
have no choice but to get raped over and over again they'll take every ounce of blood out of you until you're exhausted
I'm looking forward to the future it will only be another year and then everyone will have foret forgotten about it he's talking about never mind at this
point how wrong was that timeline no I know that's hilarious yeah I've I I
actually now have two versions of smells like smell like team Teen Spirit on my Spotify playlist it's the original and
then I have this other one that like it's a revamped like all rock version of it it's just it sounds fantastic I've
definitely gone through phases where I just like listened and never mind over and over again yeah the whole album yeah
yeah yeah of course I I actually went down a pretty deep music Rabbit Hole research in this especially
because we know a lot about the bands that influence Kurt in particular so
like like the the Melvin if you've never heard of them like that's basic basically where like the guitar influence kind of comes from the Pixies
is where that kind of disjointed lyrics that Hear n songs come from Sex Pistols
that's a lot of that anti-establishment stuff that like he was a he was a musical connoisseur like he his music
taste was fantastic like I actually like sorted I'll I'll send you a list of
these bands that I listened to as I was through researching this it goes on saying the Mel melodrama piece of it he
just never thought that anybody was actually hardcore enough he actually presented his fans in some ways like he
thought that if you like Nirvana for the music then you had to also like it for the social and political message which
is just very anti-establishment anti- fitting in and he would he's watching kids wearing polos and attending church
listener to Nirvana and that just like I think that's a big part of why he um basically turned into what he turned
into all this kind of gets us to who he is his General State of Mind and why
things are going to eventually derail so on the one hand you have Kurt who has
become basically music royalty who at his core is basically just this lost kid
with a ton of animosity towards being popular and on the other hand you have the other main character of our story which is Courtney
Love okay this is the Doom to fail piece of this So Courtney has always been
portrayed as kind of an afterthought to the story of Kurt and Courtney except to
the extent that she's demonized and villainized in it like everybody thinks that qu's essentially like this hanger
on and I'm kind of going to do a bit of like revisionism on her history as well
mostly because Kurt is the main character of the story and if I went into Courtney's life and the details of what she did this would just drag on for
like 12 hours CU she's done a lot she's done a ton of stuff she's not just
Kurt's wife she she had her own trauma growing up she had her own impactful musical career and and all the stuff
that she did with that by some account she was more famous than Kurt when they initially met yeah hole is really good
ho is great I listen to Hole too that's yeah did you uh have you ever
seen 200 Cigarettes no it's it's like a very 90s movie about a New Year's Eve
party and she's in it and she's great she's great like the The Hustler movie she was in I don't remember the name of
it but that that she was great in that too like she's great in a lot of stuff she does so yeah there's there's some
debate on when they met some say it was before never Minds release some say it was after never Minds release but if it was before then Cory was definitely more
famous than Kurt was cuz bleach wasn't a big album by all accounts yeah and I
wrote here yeah her music's fantastic and there's a lot of stuff that I learned about like a Corney that I didn't know so if you do you if you
remember like my apartment back in LA in in Hollywood which was like I guess it
was relatively close to where you you guys lived back then but I was right down the street from Jumbo's Clown Room and so she used to work at Jumbo's Clown
Room like that was one of her first things that she did while she was trying to get whole up and run running it's very cool so however they met they got
married in 1992 they got married in Hawaii and like I actually at this point don't even know if Kurt was stoned out
of his mind or if he was actually genuinely happy he looked really happy in the pictures though I feel like I can picture those let me find them yeah it
was it was weirdly like a like a cute wedding for two incredibly grungy
people oh he does look very happy yeah so it's worth noting that Kurt was in
chronic pain for most of his life to some stomach issues he had there's some conf again like there's no facts here like there's some conflict about he
tells people he's in chronic pain to justify his heroin use or was he in chronic pain and that's why he started
using hair like we don't know it's up inir wait did you did you hear like the stuff that like it was because he played
his guitar with the wrong hand no so I feel like okay this might be totally wrong but I feel like I saw something
that the way that he helds his a guitar was like not the natural way that
someone should hold their their guitar and and especially with like his like dexterity like he should have done with
the other hand but because of that he was like putting weird pressure on his stomach and that was like part of the
problem he was having oh well that yeah that could be that could be a component of this for sure yeah so we don't know
we don't know we if one came before the other but we do know obviously that Kurt dabbled in a lot of drugs and alcohol he
was not a stickler about the drugs that he used he basically used everything like whatever was there and available at the time he would use like I'm going to
get into a lot of his ODS and like some of his OD a lot of his ODS Jesus yeah so some of his ODS didn't even involve
heroin he just find whatever he could find just take it he's numb like totally wanted to numb himself out he would
start using heroin in particular off and on starting in 1986 which I think is the
year he formed Nirvana if I remember what I said correctly earlier so of all the drugs out there it seemed like
heroin is the last one you'd want to like be using and still be functional on I've obviously never done it but I read
up a ton on what just opiates in general do and it seems like it most just numbs you to everything some symptoms of
opiate intoxication are nodding off suddenly it slows down your breathing there's itching Tremor slurge speech
impaired coordination clouded thinking disorientation impaired memory basically
all the things that are counterproductive to maintaining a career in a family life I mean look
obviously I feel like it just goes without Sam I'm harp on this a little bit too much but Kurt was like an
incredibly Reckless user because I literally just stayed I'm going to get into his ODS and I used plural in
that it almost felt like he knew that his story arc would be more romantic if
he died tragically which is like contrib to his heroin usage yeah yeah yeah okay
like this is the part where I I stand up for Courtney Love which I don't know how many people have said that before in the
history Courtney really tried to keep him somewhat on the straight nrow which
she's a tragic character on her own right like she would also be doing heroin with him and ALS be doing all kinds of different drugs there's like a
whole history of her she got her Francis Bean got taken away from them because she said in a vity Fair article that she
done did heroin when she was pregnant with like she's not like a she's not like a terribly sympathetic character
but in the context of these two she actually did try she was kind of by the time
nevermind came out and he blew up and became who he became she almost became like his manager and whenever he'd have
to go places and she wasn't with him she' always tell that they were not allowed to detour anywhere because often
times he would detour and go to a drug dealer and go by heroin yeah I think part of the public perception of her was
kind of rooted in this thing where Kurt is like this free spirited dude just woo
woo whatever and she's like a Taskmaster but she's not really like all she's
trying to do is make sure her husband doesn't just like die on the road yeah
and and like yeah the stories I was reading was like he really he actually really really did love her like when he
would disappoint her he would just turn to this like sheepish child and when people saw that they were like oh she's being mean to Kur it's like no he's just
like feels bad that he disappointed his wife in that moment I read one story in the New
Yorker which was an article by Michael azerad called my time with Kurt Cobain and Michael actually wrote a biography
with Kurt and became pretty close to him throughout his life to the point where Kurt would ask him to attend business
meetings with him just so he wasn't surrounded by business people alone and one of these meetings he talks about how
Kurt got up to go to the bathroom he thought Kurt had probably just left
because he just took so long to come back and Kurt came back and was obviously just high as [ __ ] on heroin
and everybody just kind of ignored it because he's with these business people like who cares like he's a genius let him do his genius thing which is like
let him get [ __ ] up as much as he wants we're going to make money off him anyways apparently Michael walks him back to the
hotel that he's say hang out with Courtney and again like Courtney's just like disappointed in him and that night
he OES and they have the baby yeah at this point yeah at this point they have
Francis pan so like again think about this from Courtney's perspective like you're raising a child you're trying to
manage this insane career that you have on your own that your husband has and also this guy just constantly out of his mind doing heroin so in my opinion
Courtney is the one who's like she's the one who got [ __ ] in this situation more than Kurt did ch use accelerates um
quite a bit and at this point so I I counted three ODS at this point um where
Courtney herself had to be the one to inject him with Narcan to bring him back oh God yeah so there was a tour stop
which is apparently the last one they did this was in Munich and Kurt gets
actually sick from bronchitis and laryngitis so he goes to Rome to pursue medical treatment and courney meets up
with him there this is March 3rd that courney meets him in Rome for medical which we me March 4th he od's again my
God and this OD actually wasn't heroin he he from what I recall I didn't write
this down but from when iall it was like it was alcohol and um and roipnol that
he od's on at this time yeah yeah I I don't know why that is but yeah I would
assume as an addict you just get whatever you can get right yeah he's just trying to numb everything I mean yeah you're right yeah I wrote down this
just obviously keeps happening a lot so later on Courtney would again we don't know the facts later on Courtney stated
that this was a suicide attempt we don't know because earlier on they said it's just an OD because part of this is also
couch as like he's a genius like Geniuses do heroin like normal totally
that's what them yeah so to them they're like it's better if we just say that he Ed on heroin than that we say he took roipnol and alcohol to try and kill
himself basically yeah so after this incident Courtney the bandmates friends they all staged an intervention this is
on March 25th of 1994 Kurt loses his mind because he is the guy like he's who
are you to tell me what to do like I'm I'm Kurt Cain eventually he agrees to go
to rehab he went to a rehab clinic on March 30th so 5 days after this
intervention he goes to the reab clinic he lasts three days before he scales the fence takes the cap to LAX and flies
back to Seattle at this point nobody knows where Kurt Is So Courtney ends up
hiring a private investigator around April 3rd to try and find him again he just disappears again we publicly
demonized her but look at what this woman had to do she investigator to find her husband who's like abandoning his
family to do drugs yeah yeah so on April 8th an electrician came to Curt and
Courtney's house to install a security system and at that point that is when they discover Kurt's body he's the one
who finds the body he shot himself under the neck under the chin and he left a
suicide note he was also not surprisingly super super high on heroin when they did the autopsy there is some
debate as to whether he would have died anyways because of the heroin I learned so much about heroin
researching this so the reason it is debated is because we don't know if the amount of heroin in a system that they
measured was called free morphine or whether it was total morphine free
morphine is what you inject at that time total morphine is what is in your system
always because you're a habitual user oh yeah if the amount they found in a system was free morphine then yeah he
would have OED he would have died anyways whether he would have shot himself or not he would have died if not then probably not he the gunshots would
would have had to have taken him out during the autopsy it is assumed that he died on April 5th so again he flees the
uh Place whatever The Recovery Place on the third gets to Seattle he sneaks up into this greenhouse that is a two-
story Greenhouse apparently and he just kind of chills there doing drugs and whatever he's doing at that time nobody
finds him like apparently there's a bunch of people coming in and out of the house but nobody finds them because I looked at pictures of the house the
greenhouse was separate from the main house and they're all junkies and they all nobody's going to plant
flowers I've seen that I've seen that too and like yeah I think like didn't like the private investigator missed it
too like he didn't even see the house the green house yeah yeah if you want because I know you want to Zillow everything ter the house is
171 Lake Washington Boulevard in Seattle this estimate is $7.8 million which
given the fact that his guitar alone sold for $6 million
that's a bargain yeah oh it's nice it has a nice view of like some water it's weird I actually don't find the house
creepy even though somebody died in it it does have a it's a has well the
Zillow picture it has like a of like Amon lights you know that is is fun um
it's huge 8,000 square feet yeah it's huge oh sh there only four bedrooms I feel there should be more bedrooms you
don't find it creepy do you like when I think about the tote family and like moving living in that
house that scares me but there living like that house Kirk Cobain killed himself and that actually doesn't scare me no not really and wait when did he
die this one in '94 so when in '94 April
uh they they think it's April 5th which I really should have waited three weeks to do this episode and it would have been anniversary and I totally
botched it boo um so he bought it in I love Zillow God BL Zillow um they bought
it in in January 1994 for 1.4 million yeah and then they sold it she sold it
in 1997 for 2.8 and then it sold in 2020 for seven yeah cool continue okay um now
your your the low thing is unrivaled [ __ ] love theow I just want I want to know
everything it's it's worth noting that there were other moments that were building up to this again going back to
Courtney's life being a living hell so the gun Kurt used actually wasn't his own because his guns had been
confiscated multiple times by the police because there were multiple reports of according you calling the cops saying
Kurt has locked himself in a bathroom high as [ __ ] on heroin with a loaded gun and threatening to kill himself so this
is repops yeah they show be like okay we'll just we're just G to go ahead and take your guns away from you um but yeah
what a living hell so on the conspiracy side of this there's a ton of conspiracy surrounding Kurt's death most of them
revolve around courtne having killed Kurt which these people are generally pretty awful so the people who are saying this
stuff for the most part are at best tangentially connected to Curt Courtney they're basically just like these
Hangers On and losers so this includes the private investigator who courney initially hired to find kurtt he also
said Courtney must have killed him which is like what a loser like
you you there were two documentaries that came out at the same time about this in yeah there's a there's so many
documentaries about this I watched one of them last night actually also Courtney's father came out saying that
Courtney probably killed Kurt like how the [ __ ] do you know yeah I I wrote I
wrote this down because apparently during the divorce Courtney's divorce proceeding or during
Courtney's parents divorce proceeding there was several people that came out and testified that her dad the one who
said that she killed Kurt also used to dose her with LSD when she was a toddler E Yeah like there was a ton of
other allegations against him no matter what he had full custody revoked for ever like seeing her when she was when
she was a kid so yeah now he's trying to like me in the news like yeah like I'm I'm relevant I'm important I know
Courtney Love I'm her dad I should probably talk about the suicide uh note for for a bit so it's it's kind of long
um it's at least it's at least a full page in length maybe a little bit longer than that and it starts out really just
talking about his career about how he knows he should be enjoying this more than he really is he references Freddy
Mercury in it and he says like he really paid attention to how much Freddy
Mercury enjoyed like the Adoration of crowds and he was like I wish I could be like him and like enjoy it the way he
enjoys it so he has the wherewithal to be really self-reflective In This Moment
despite probably at this point being super super high um and he has he totally understands the nature of what
he's doing and what like what he's leaving behind by doing this I'll read a little bit of the I mean this this
sounds like it's going to be a lot but this is actually a really small subset of the suicide note itself so this is a
this is I'm quoting this exactly there's good in all of us and I
think I simply love people too much so much that it makes me feel too [ __ ] sad the sad little sensitive
unappreciated Pisces Jesus man why don't you just enjoy it I don't know I have a
goddess of a wife who sweats ambition empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what I used to be full of
love and joy and that terrifies me to the point where I can barely function I can't stand the thought of Francis
becoming the miserable self-destructive death rocker that I've become I have it good very good and I'm grateful but
since the age of seven I've become res I've become hateful towards all humans in general only because it seems so easy
for people to get along that have empathy only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess thank
you all for the from the pit of my burning nauseous stomach for your letters and concerns during the past years I'm too much of an erratic Moody
baby I don't have the passion anymore and so remember it's better to burn out than to fade out Peace Love empathy Kirt
Cobain Francis and Courtney I'll be at your alter please keep Courtney sorry
please keep going Courtney for Francis for her life with which will be so much happier without me I love you I love you
I think he could have used some therapy and some other kinds of drugs yeah he's depressed he's
anti-depressants yeah and yeah I wonder I wonder like what would have happened
if he like didn't do that like who who'd be right now because I look at like Dave Gro like they're so different like Dave
Gro and Chris Noble like they were not junkies at all like they they never did
drugs like they they did not go down that path and you look at them now and like they're just like groovy 50y old
people like doing cool [ __ ] feeding the homeless I don't know I don't know what would have happened to Kur but um how
did well how did Taylor Hawkins die Hawkins um he did so Taylor Hawkins is
was the drummer of the food Fighters he just died he died last year about a year ago and he died of a drug overdose
really and his he died in Colombia while they were on tour I think and it says
that his toxicology so that he had um opioids anti-depressants THC like a
bunch of drugs in his system jeez something about that lifestyle um so
yeah I I wrote down that line better to burnout than to fade out I I really want to just if if I have the wherewithal I'm
going to scream that from my deathbed that is such a good line so Legacy wise look like he basically died rock and
roll royalty um he's now part of this 27 Club which we all know what that is um I
mean look he's on that list with Joplin Morrison and Hendrick like that's the caliber of person that he he became and
Amy wi housee died at 27 too I forgot about that that's crazy yeah Cory would
go on she'd create more music more movies she never remarried um there's some like she kind of seemed like she
kept being like kind of a junkie in a lot of ways but again I'm not going to fault her she's going through a lot of [ __ ] and a lot of trauma Francis
inherited a huge chunk of Kurt's estate and now owns the rights to his name and images um
yeah she is like she's loaded like ctt's estate is like his likeness is worth so
much money I forgot what the exact number was but it was somewhere in like the $400 million range is like what that
value of like just having access having the licensing rights to that is what the as are worth she married a musician that
everybody compared to Kurt in 2014 they divorce and now she's basically just living her life doing her thing um she
looks exactly like Curt Courtney's child it's amazing she's so pretty yeah no she
looks exactly like both of them yeah but wait I have a question you don't think it's weird the way that the gun was and
how he could have killed himself cuz I know that's part of the conspiracy is like he would have had to
like like it was like a rifle under his chin yeah yeah he would have had to pull it with like his thumb or something like
or his foot like yeah I've I've heard those um rumors too my my thing is I'm
just thinking about like from a human nature perspective he he's like the biggest thing he's like the
biggest artist biggest like celebrity in the world like if somebody had done that
would if we have figured that out like that's fair if courney actually and also you read the suicide note there's
nothing suspicious about the suicide note like I mean people claim that maybe that's not his handwriting but it was and he definitely states that like I'm
doing like it doesn't it's not ambiguous as maybe not a suicide note and also he would have probably died anyways because
of the heroin overdose yeah I mean he was probably with like whatever he said like the the morphine that was like in
his body kind of like permanently he was probably like rehab was probably physically [ __ ] terrible because he
probably was like doing a bunch of like withdrawals draws and stuff you know I can't believe he made three days that's
insane yeah that sounds terrible um so that's them and like I said I kind of
framed this as Courtney was the one that kind of got the rough end of this because yeah Kurt's a bigger celebrity
and we all loved Kurt and then yeah and then people are like mad at her when she was just like trying to keep her family
together and then also yeah are there like terrible pictures of her like holding Francis and crying outside their house and stuff that like like people
like wouldn't leave her alone and and all of that so yeah that's awful yeah so
that's rockstars man yeah just God like
so much heroin like just W like I I cut out so much of this story because I
literally just would have said heroin 500 more times yeah um so yeah that's why we had coffee so yeah
that's fair Seattle story but yeah that's my story and now I'm GNA once I wrap this up go look at tulips at Home
Depot nice I'm G to listen to some Nirvana at the Airbnb I'm saying at the Fridge plays music it's like has a whole
screen on it so I'm going to maybe I'll put some Nirvana on it it's been playing pitball but I'll put Nirvana on Mr
worldwide Mr 305 um I watched uh so HBO if you have HBO Max they have a uh a
great documentary about uh curtain Nirvana In general but specifically curtain Courtney um called the Montage
of heck which is like a lot of just live footage of recordings of them just hanging out together and I mean it is
grungy it's very yeah so of it's hard to watch but it's it gives you really good um insight
into like their lives but anyways totally time what a time what a Time Crazy um shout out to everyone who all
those grunch girls who were all black for like a year afterward seriously it's still hot it's still hot I don't like I
still I'm still drawn to that but um no yeah oh yeah nothing's wrong with that
but they did it specifically because kir Coan died and they were so sad I listen to this one podcast where this guy was
talking about where there talking about his death and they were like he was like yeah I wasn't into his music I didn't really know but then later I became when
I was like a late teenager I got into his music and for one day I wore a black
band around my like my arm to because I was so like distraught over his death he
died like yeah died like 10 years earlier and and everybody was like I don't understand did like a firefighter
die or like why why are you wearing this black band I just remembered that's fair we can still you can still like discover
the music and be sad about it yeah you know yeah um do you want to call out do
you want to be the one that calls out please rate and review us yeah so thanks everyone for scking through this episode
I feel like I that I learned a lot about about rock and roll relationships um
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