We are running late this week due to travel, so let's re-release! This is a top-notch story - The Mutiny on the Bounty! The Bounty was headed to Tahiti to learn how to propagate breadfruit for nefarious reasons - but there was plenty of back and forth and infighting and wanting to stay in Tahiti, bad leadership, and a mutiny! So fun. Hope you love it.
We are running late this week due to travel, so let's re-release! This is a top-notch story - The Mutiny on the Bounty! The Bounty was headed to Tahiti to learn how to propagate breadfruit for nefarious reasons - but there was plenty of back and forth and infighting and wanting to stay in Tahiti, bad leadership, and a mutiny!
So fun. Hope you love it.
Hi Friends! Our transcripts aren't perfect, but I wanted to make sure you had something - if you'd like an edited transcript, I'd be happy to prioritize one for you - please email doomedtofailpod@gmail.com - Thanks! - Taylor
I am going to do a re-release this Monday morning because we are going to record a switch later this week due to
travel schedules and all that but I wanted to give you something and I wanted to re-release this episode cuz
this is one of my favorites it's the story of the Mutiny and the Bounty and I feel like this story really gave me the
jump to do other stories about ex the exact same time so learning about Captain Cook we're learning about
exploration we're learning about sailing we're learning about um
the um islands that people are going to that they've never seen before and we're
hearing all these stories and it's pretty exciting so I am I don't know I
love this let me know if there's more fun stories of the high seas you know we do do um the Franklin Expedition later
but really like to me the idea of being on like a boat in uncharted waters in the middle of nowhere is just wild like
you might as well be space so uh I love hearing about it let me know if you have any other ideas we were at Doom tood
gmail.com and as a reminder we are re-releasing our first 26 episodes we did two stories in one and now we're
doing them you know just Mondays and Wednesdays so I'm separating them re-releasing them I think this is
episode 15 part two and uh once I'm done doing this and we'll have other fun things on the side but let us know what
you think in a matter of the people of State of California versus orthal James Simpson case number ba
and so my fellow Americans ask not what your country can
do for you ask what you can do for your [Music]
country let's flip over to talk about historical failure and the crazy story
you might have guessed by the rum that we're going into the high seas and we're going to talk about the Mutiny on the
Bounty have you heard of that before I have this is this is this is um oh my
God this is this isn't Amistad is it no no because that's Amistad this is Bounty
right correct the Bounty is a ship though see I know I know enough to know that I knew okay so I have heard it hi
so the meetting on the Bounty I got this idea actually from my boss she mentioned it she was like I was looking this up this weekend and it was crazy and I was
like cool so so I was going to do something else this week but then I had um to like read a book and I was like I
know if I can read a whole book this week I'm super busy so I was able to listen to a book and watch a movie to
learn a little bit about this about this story um so I read a National Geographic
um article I watched the 1962 movie mutin on the Bounty with Marlon Brando and then I also read the book by Captain
blly who's the captain he wrote a book after called like the Bey on the Bounty Sally that's what what it's called so I
read his book so before I get to that story I stumbled Upon A True Crime Story
while researching it so I'll tell this really fast so like I said I watched the 1962 film Mutiny on the Bounty super
long there's an intermission and an overture I love an overture but like it's crazy long Marlon Brando plays
Fletcher Christian one of the main characters he has this like really weird English accent where it's like hi like
it's like a high voice and like a no Brando's voice is not made to be British
sound I know it's real weird so he's like he's like uh he's in it kind of plays like more of a he's more of a rich
guy as we'll learn so in the movie they go to toiti you're going to learn this in a little bit too there's a woman who
dances like for Marlon Brando in the movie and they do like a lot of eye contact and you're like I don't know
there's something going on between those two like they're definitely you know whatever looking each other weird so it turns out that she this is real in real
life This Woman This she's a 19-year-old actress from Tahiti like actress is loose it was just like they went to Tahiti and like grabbed all the local
people to be in this movie and so he T he's 36 she's 19 he takes
her back to LA and they get married her name is terita terapia she's still alive
she's 81 so he brings this like young woman back from Teti to La it was up and
down cuz he's kind of a monster just like you know being a movie star doing all these things like being mean they have two kids in total he has 11 kids
and and he died in 2004 but some of his kids are young they're like younger than us they're like 29 seriously which is
bizarre yeah so I bet I bet they like pretty good-looking kids though oh yeah everyone's real goodl looking I mean
everyone's [ __ ] gorgeous Mar BR is gorgeous I mean he was yes I know I'm
not saying like island of Dr Maro Mor Brando is gorgeous but like Mor Brando and mut on the Bounty is gorgeous dud he
had a kid who was 49 years old and died in 2008 okay wait wait I'm getting there
stop I'm am I ruining things no just wait wait me don't read about his kids kids upop so one of his 11 kids the one
that he has with terita um he has two kids with her one of them is a daughter named Cheyenne so Cheyenne has it rough
her dad is like ignores her and is mean to her he ends up buying some property in Tahiti and like building a hotel and
having the mom manage it and kind of ignoring his family so she's like I hate my I hate my dad now it's the
90s Cheyenne Marlon Brando's daughter has a boyfriend his name is dag drolet
and he is abusive towards her so he starts abusing Cheyenne and then Marlin
Brando has another son Christian from his first marriage who's older than Cheyenne are you with me so there yeah
like it's just like like it's just such a good-looking cluster of humans they're also good
looking oh my God so uh Christian is older than Cheyenne their half siblings
and Cheyenne who whose mom is from Tahiti from the movies her dad is Marlon Brando um has a boyfriend named dag and
Christian comes to Marlon Brando's house where dag and Cheyenne are having a fight and Christian shoots him point
blank in the head and kills him good for him so Marlon Brando son kills his half
half sister's um boyfriend who's being an abusive [ __ ] guess who Christian's
lawyer is when he is on trial um the guy who uh oh god um The
Charles Manson prosecutor Robert Shapiro no [ __ ]
yeah Robert Shapiro but a bunch of like exclamation points so Christians pleads
guilty he Ser he gets 10 years he serves five um Cheyenne didn't testify she
attempted suicide twice she was also pregnant with D's child and um later
they thought that Christian was also involved in helping Robert Blake murder his wife but that's not like confirmed
and he's the one who died at of pneumonia in 2008 at age 49 so Christian died Cheyenne has her baby then she's
diagnosed as schizophrenic and in 1995 she's only 25 years old and she dies by suicide by shooting herself damn is that
wild it's like life is so life I well depression is the thing right I was going to say like if you're Marlon
Brando's kid like life has got to be [ __ ] way cooler than it is from me
and you I know you just don't know I guess you know anyway that's crazy
that's all that's my true CRI story I stumbled upon more than Brando so effortlessly cool like I'm sure he was
I'm sure he was a jerk off but like yeah it's like dude like the way he's rocking this suit like this picture of him and
Cheyenne with like him holding her from behind with a lay the lay on was like
yes effortless absolutely effortless so handsome it's crazy and the kids are gorgeous you know like um yeah
everyone's beautiful so yes okay so that's just a crazy story that happened because I was reading about mut in the
body of the movie so I watched that movie there is a Mel Gibson movie but I didn't watch it because I'm not sure if
we're ready to separate the art from the artist on M Gibson we do we still hate M Gibson I don't know do we I think I feel
like yes because of the anti-Semitism and his dad being a literal Nazi oh I you know what I don't I'm not up on the
dad Nazi thing but I think that like rart no I know but that was like before
we knew about the na anyway who cares I didn't watch that it's available okay we are in
17787 and so we're a little bit P the uh American Revolutionary War Britain lost
but they still have a lot of other things going on they're fighting with France they're trying to um manage this
gigantic slave trade that they're doing and they're trying to colonize the rest of the world so Britain is still very very busy it's November
1787 and a ship called the HMS Bounty heads to Tahiti it's called OT Tahiti
and then later changes to Tahiti I don't know why the captain is William blly the
first lieut liutenant is Fletcher Christian that's Mar Rando and in total there's 46 dudes on the boat what's the
first lieutenant is that like he's like so because the Bounty was not of the
biggest ship it was one of the smallest ships that that the British Navy had it was called a cutter so because it had it
was so small and it was I'll tell you what they were going to do in a second it had no officers other than Blye so
the captain was the only person who was actually an officer of the Navy everybody else was like just like kind
of like regular Sailors including Fletcher Christian it's a very small crew no Royal Marines to protect the
ship which you would usually have so it's like a pretty small group of folks those 46 guys okay the Captain William
Blye um had traveled to like all around the world a lot before he went with
someone named Captain James Cook cook had first sailed to Dei in 1769 he sailed all over the world he was
eventually killed by native Hawaiians which I wrote I'm fine with because it sounds like he did a lot of like
colonizing but the goal for the HMS Bounty was to get bread fruit to bring back to the West Indies to feed enslaved
people essentially so in Tahiti and in like that part of the world like a little bit like north of Australia like
that area there's a fruit called bread fruit it's been around for thousands of years it's like a big I'll post a
picture of it but it's like a big green fruit and the inside you can like bake
it kind of tastes like bread if you bake it the right way you can like boil it cook it in all different kinds of ways
depending on the time of year you can almost always Harvest it and it's like plentiful and has a lot of nutrients so it's something that they thought they
could you know bring it to the West Indies and just feed all those slaves with it and feed them just bread fruit basically okay um have you ever had like
jack fruit that tastes like pulled pork I I don't think I've ever had jack fruit it's like pretty crazy the stuff they
can do with it like they do like a thing that I know add bunch of barbecue sauce tastes like pulled pork and it tastes
exactly like pulled pork it's really weird but think is like similar to that so the HMS the Bounty had a botanist on
board so there were um there were 46 men 44 of them were like the crew two of them were botanists who were there to
get the fruit they had taken the Captain's Quarters and they had cut
holes in the floor and added more windows and made it into a greenhouse to be able to put pots of bread fruit in
once they got there so Captain B slept in like a much smaller room and everybody was pretty cramped because that was like a big space that they had
um allocated for the plants make sense yes hey do you remember this is like so
I'm like having this memory arrive to me way after your point about the colon colonizing but you remember that guy who
was like a missionary who went to that one North seminal Island I was thinking about him too doing this I [ __ ] love
that he was just butchered like a hog like I think it's awesome I think it's like dude stop [ __ ] taking people's
religions stop taking people's cultures away from them you should you should literally deserve to
die like I I Chow his name was CH it was C H auau I think I I I I hate to say it
but I love that they were just like [ __ ] you and just like shot him with arrow [ __ ] love it it's it's one one of one of the most heartwarming Stories That
Should Be A Christmas Tale don't [ __ ] do that don't [ __ ] take people's cultures from them there a lot of that's
happening in this story in this time yeah absolutely absolutely yeah so okay so they left in November
1787 they arrive in October 1788 so took a little over 10 months and it was
27,000 M to arrive in Tahiti from England the trip was exhausting a few
people died there was a ship surgeon and like surgeon I think should be in like 17 air quotes because it was just like
maybe the Cook or whatever yeah and he he ended up killing a dude by accident because the dude had asthma so he was
like bleeding him and he had a blood poisoning and died okay obviously
predictable yeah yeah the captain BL was actually pretty mean he would order a lashing or anyone who broke the rules so
a lot of people like getting whipped and punished for things and the book he's very casual about it cuz it's his book which I didn't even realize when I was
reading it that it was like his when I first started reading it I was like oh this is like his actual account of this but he was like I'm maintaining order
what am I supposed to do so it was like a pretty strict um time it kind of makes
sense that it's called Mutiny on the Bounty when you're beating the Shad out of people like what am I supposed to do like not that probably yeah one thing
that I wrote in uh that I added in my notes that I thought was fun fun not fun they ate albatrosses like they would
like catch them out of the sky and eat them and like the big bird so one yeah
it's a rough trip takes 10 months they're supposed to go via cap horn underneath South America but it was too
late in the year to do that so they ended up going the other way down below Africa they spent some time in Tasmania
which is called Adventure Bay for parents Adventure Bay from PAW Patrol I don't think they're in there but that's
funny also in captain bl's book so much of it is like we were at this latitude and longitude and it was like this time
and I'm like how the [ __ ] do they know what latitude and longitude they were at so I looked it up and I have no idea I like it's called a SE a chronometer time
piece [ __ ] it's like the thing that could do it it's like if you I'll if you look it up it's like a beautiful like
wooden briefcase with like a all these like gears in it like it looks like a time like a something you would use in
like a time machine you know like it's looks fun but they had like they had they were just starting to figure this out and fig where they were they were
like discovering Islands sort of obviously like they're not the first people there but then they'd be like oh
I think if you're at this lude and longitude you should see this island that has like three hills so that like someone else can like maybe know where
they are later but yeah seems really scary just to be out in the out in the ocean with just like guessing and like
math and looking at the stars if it's cloudy you're like I don't know where the [ __ ] I am you know so they they were hardier back then I yes so now they're
in Tahiti they're about to go on to shore the captain blly has everyone checked for STDs and everyone is fine in
the movie they're like nobody thought so you're just going to gloss over that nobody thought it was [ __ ] weird that
no hold on more so no they they did not have STDs when they got off the boat allegedly in the movie they were like
the women loved having sex with us like they loved it like whatever like they say that but in real life they were
obviously like trading sexual favors for money and like beads and nails and things when it was all over for 40% of
the men contracted an STD the STDs had been introduced to Tahiti by the English
and French explorers anyway you know so hold on so the women had the STDs that
they gave the guys yeah yeah it all originated from other Europeans who went there earlier yeah yeah yeah and were
like using them as like consorts and such so somehow the Bounty had a lot of stuff on it they were always able to
trade gifts you know so they were like you know here's a mirror and a knife and all these things and and so he was
making captain BL was making friends with the chief tinina was the chief's name t y n ah Captain BL never slept off
the boat he stayed on his boat while the men started to like live on the island with the native people but he entertained the Chiefs and their wives
almost every night there were a couple Petty thefts on the boat but there were sometimes okay usually it was totally it
was fine the chief wanted to come back to England and meet King George and bl
was like not today not this time you know so aim lower yeah meet his guards exactly so they
like made a little you know they made friends and he was making friends with the leadership and basically being like
can we have this bread fruit this is why we're here that's the thing that our King wants and they were like sure you do a [ __ ] ton of it but it was hard to
cultivate you can't just like take it with you there's no seeds in it it has to be cultivated directly from the root so they had to like wait for the root to
grow and for the plants to be Hardy enough to be able to leave so this turned into like basically a Fantasy
Life for all these men exactly it sounds like a fantasy like it's [ __ ] gorgeous there's like Delicious Fruit
everywhere there's like beautiful women everywhere and like yeah no they loved it yeah I can see where they mutinied
yeah so fler Christian he is the oh I don't know I mentioned this but he so
he's like kind of like the the second in command um he comes from a wealthy family like they expected him to be a lawyer but he decided he wanted to like
go on adventures and such Fletcher Christian is 23 and Captain BL is 33 during during this just to get some
ideas like in the movie Captain B seems a lot older than 33 but basically they were like not that far apart he's
Anthony Hopkins and yeah he's not that old that's crazy Anthony Hopkins was
born like 60 years old I know he was never 33 yeah yeah um so Fletcher
Christian had a girlfriend her name was maua that's the girl that Marlo Brando
flirts with in the movie and then ends up in real life marrying and in the movie The Mar Brando is like fooling
around with her and the captain is like you have to stop and the chief well in the movie She's the daughter of the chief and the um the chief is like what
my daughter is good enough for you so the captain literally goes I need you to go make love to that woman and Marlin brandle goes fine and um they put him on
a boat and Martin Brando's like standing on this like little Schooner going to land to like basically have sex with
this girl and they have him standing up at the front of the boat with his leg up and it plays the song like the dunununun
dun dun dun dun it's like really stupid but like funny like he's like I guess he'll have sex with her for the for the
colony but that's not true they were just like paying them for itally and I can't oh I can't hear you I see you I
see you moving your mouth I was muted I was gonna say I guess if it's Marlon Brando and he's gonna whip it out you got to make it dramatic right right
exactly and I think in real life there's probably a lot of also a lot of sexual assaults so not great so it's been five
months the bread fruit is finally working it's in the pots it's healthy they put it all on they have like couple
thousand plants they put them on the on the Bounty and they're going to go back to the West Indies and everything looks
good so April 1st 1789 the Bounty set sail again back to England via the West
Indies obviously like you said the crew is not stoked they're like why can't we stay here [ __ ] this yeah like I don't
want to go live a [ __ ] five 10 more months on this boat in like doing all this hard labor and being whipped all
the time and like it's terrible and so also another argument for why capitalism
is flawed is if you could nobody who could live that life would then choose
to go back to a capitalistic structure of I got to wake up at 8 am. to do this like exactly they lost a lot of their
discipline that like a big part of it too they were like why would I go back to like following rules yeah so and also
the captain's mean and it feels worse because they're like now I have an idea of what a good life could be like so
there's a lot of stuff that happens like a lot of abuse by the captain um there's lashings people aren't allowed to have water in the movie at I'm sure they did
this they pulled someone under the ship you know how you like like tied him to a rope and like pulled him across the bottom of the ship which would like
really hurt cuz you'd like get all scratched and that guy end up dying so people are dying BL like wasn't really
aware of how mad the the the sailors were he was just like everything's fine
it's hard but that's life at the sea you know so he didn't really like he wasn't I don't know he wasn't worried about a
mutiny in real life it's thought that captain blly on April 27th 1789 so it's
it's been like about a month that they've been back at Sea he accuses Christian of fleder Christian of stealing coconuts and punishes everybody
so everyone is in trouble for this like alleged infraction that may or may not even have happened and everyone's pissed
so now everyone like most people are mad so the next day April 28th 1789 a group
of mutineers led by Christian armed themselves with muskets and swords and they burst into the captain's cabin
cabin said I'm taking you prisoner um Christian said I have been in hell for weeks past with you so they take him and
some of his guards and people who were loyal to the captain and they bring them to the the ship I know the up upstairs
on the ship BL is surprise they force him into a boat but the boat's not big enough cuz actually 18 of the of the
people who are left want to like go with the captain or they're like not sure what to do so he ends up getting a pretty big boat and um the captain block
and those 18 men they give them some food and they put them in in this boat and like let them go so this sounds even
worse than being on the Bounty in general obviously cuz they're in like a schooner they're on this for many weeks
sometimes they see Islands mostly they're just eating a tiny amount of moldy bread this is where they get a teaspoon of rum every day to try to like
warm up cuz it's freezing and it's raining and they're constantly bailing water out of it that's how they warm up
is have a teaspoon of rum yeah and he says that like that's awful it's awful
and they they're it's cuz it's raining so much they don't really run out of water which is great but they're also constantly soaking wet and the rain is
cold but the sea water is pretty warm so they take their clothes off and they rinse them in the sea water and then put
them back on for warmth which sounds awful you're just like soing w if you if
okay so I'm going to ask like do do you think the way I think if it was me like sure listen I'm probably going
to die here anyways I just want to get trash one more time just give me all the [ __ ] run like you know what I mean
like just like go for broke and then just like have one good night and then you know that it's all going to suck
from there on out right I know but what a way to go just like starving to death on a boat you know I I I I fundamentally
like in my core I really don't have a problem with eating a person like I just never thought that weird thing like it's like no I would totally yeah no so I
don't think I would go out that way I definitely would spend my time trying to be someone that everybody likes would murder me and eat me I would tell jokes
I don't know so me and you would have to team up me and you would have to team up so like because because like because I
don't want to hurt people naturally so you'd have to distract them so I can
grab them from behind and choke them perfect I'll tell jokes okay great know you're the funny one we'll be like hey
hey you want to go on a boat with us'll be like no no I've listen to your podcast I know exactly what you have
planned so it is Captain B and 18 men also everyone is sick obviously because
you're eating moldy bread and they're barely eating so everyone like just like constantly sick meanwhile the Bounty
goes back towards Tahiti they find an island about 400 miles from Tahiti called Tui and they stay there the
natives are like we don't want you here they're different it's a different group of people than we're on Tahiti they're like who are you we don't want you here
they don't they don't speak the same language um so they killed a bunch of them and like the the sailors on the
Bounty killed a bunch of the natives they go back to Tahiti to the people that they know to get supplies and so so
they lie and say that like the captain died they don't tell anybody about the Mutiny because they they don't want them
to know that this happened and they take 30 tahitians back with them to this
island eventually it's just too much like the natives who are there don't want them there um and there's a lot of
killing and a lot of fighting so they go back to Tahiti so the mutineers are a mess they end up getting in another
fight and dividing up so 16 of them stay in Tahiti and the rest including
Fletcher chrisan R Brando pretend to throw a party and invite 30 natives onto the Bounty and essentially kidnap them
and enslave them so they can build a settlement on another Island so they leave God it's like it's like almost
entrenched innate second nature to find people
and horribly use them horuse them weird it's such includes women that they're
like using as like sex slaves essentially it's such a weird Instinct it's like when I meet a person I don't immediately think how how can I use and
abuse you to my own benefit yeah maybe I should that's my that's know that's my
fault that's my problem don't do that right um so now the original crew of The Bounty is in three different groups and
here's what happened to them so group one is with Captain BL and his men they are on that small boat they eventually
uh reach safety in tamour which is like another Island um a little bit north it's about 6,000 mil away from where
they started they get back to England and send a ship black back to Tahiti to
get the to get the the mutineers also as soon as they took over the Bounty they threw all of the bread plants out of it
so they were like so they were just like [ __ ] you you also it was just a former Rebellion yeah
yeah so they that that was that's not even an option anymore Bly Captain blly does get Court Marshals and acquitted of
responsibility for the loss of the ship eventually um there were other Wars and such and Captain B ended up being
mutinied again in the rum rebellion and new South Wales Australia which was not on a boat but like they took they they
like rebelled against him because he was being a terrible leader and it's Australia's only military rebellion and
I we can talk more about that later I don't know much about it but like you're a bad leader Captain B and um he ended
up going back to England he died oh he got put on a ship for two years on like a prison ship after that Mutiny in
Australia and then he went back to England he died of cancer at home in London at the age of 63 so he yeah he
like kept going even though he was you whatever then the second group the MERS that were left on Tahiti so the ship
that blly sent back in 1791 to get the muers was called the Pandora when they
got back to Tahiti there were 14 left 14 of the muers were left alive on Tahiti
the Pandora took them back it ended up pretty quickly after leaving Tahiti sinking it landed it got like stuck in
Coral it sunk they tried to save the prisoners but four of them drowned because they were still Shackled In the
bottom of the boat so um now there's only 10 left so these 10 10 MERS are left they go back to England four were
acquitted six were sented to death by hanging and three ended up being pardoned and three of them ended up
being hanged Thomas berket John milward and Thomas Ellison they were all hanged on October 29th 172
1794 for the Mutiny and they're the only ones who were ever actually punished I
mean probably good move like you can't have people just [ __ ] it's never going to end well when so here's one
thing I've learned that you're going to screw me again we have there's so many I
think bad leadership is better than no leadership Taylor's making a face she's
pondering the question maybe no maybe there like something somebody has to take charge right
because absent any leadership you have chaos yeah and chaos is rarely
productive oh and that's what they ended up having the the MERS cuz they couldn't agree on anything right and that's I
feel that's what always happens like that's what you see happening when like there is you know like you like have a
good idea but if no one's in charge like that's what happened to um what was that thing with occupy occupy Ball Street
yeah 99% movement yeah yeah they had no leadership and so that's how all that's
how all that [ __ ] ends up is like yeah different factions like what yeah yeah
totally so so yeah AB absolutely and that that's what happens to the last group so the third group is is Christian
is Christian and his group they go to pit Karen Island which is another Island where they want to have a permanent settlement with you know their slaves I
didn't finish the movie it's long I think I I think I like you can get on
YouTube for free but they do find an island Christian has a son and he has a
pretty great name so here's another name that you can give to your future children uh Fletcher Christian has a son
with a native tan Woman and the son's name is Thursday October which
is great because neither of those are our names that is the stupidest [ __ ] name ever heard my entire life I've never
heard of a dumber name no I know they should have those
aren't names the doctor should take that child away when the burth is submitted like
not okay that's pretty great it's pretty G so essentially the women were sex slaves and the men were being abused to
like build this like Little Colony on this island some women even tried to leave on a boat but they were unsuccessful and they had to come back
one woman her name was um tar Rua she died by suicide because she was just like so tired of the abuse they did
horrible things to these people that they had live on this island in September 1793 there was a Uprising by the the the
natives that they had on this little island with them and they killed four of the eight MERS that were left including
clutcher Christian so he dies in 1793 the British don't find them until
1808 and when they find them there's only one man left on this island um well one English man left on this island
there's a lot of really fat just one really fat guy and there's a bunch of skeletons for real um his name was John
Adams so he was you know involved in a lot of the turmoil on the island there's
a lot there was like murder one guy wanted to marry uh CH Christians like
Widow in parenthesis like in quotes and threatened to kill every on so they killed him with a hatchet and a sleep so
they're like fighting against each other like this it's like it's wild and then one of the guys was like super upset
about just like everything and he he jumped off a cliff so everyone like is kind of losing their minds so guess
where John Adams turns after this he becomes president of the United States no um he becomes very religious so he
finds God and becomes very Christian somehow he also had a Bible so he tries to live life by the Bible and you know
starts to like be a big part of bring Christianity to these islands and and does that even though he's definitely
been a [ __ ] hole [ __ ] this whole time and then he ended up being pardon what's interesting about that like you
go to these places and you realize how incredibly amazing and Rich that life is
yeah and tell yourself I gotta make this like my own my old spot I got to bring Jesus into
this like it's just like what I mentioned when I talked about that one guy the Egyptian Guy where it's like why the [ __ ] would you go somewhere and then
try and turn that place into a thing that you escaped like it makes no sense there's actually a quote at the end of
this National Geographic article where a historian in 2017 said European European
explorers effectively destroyed all the things that people had found exotic and attractive about tesan
culture yeah did the [ __ ] worst so um I actually feel weird and guilty that I
like Hawaii as much as I do because I know that learn about that
huh we should talk about that sometime all the terrible things that happened in Hawaii I don't know I don't really know them so I don't know them that well
either it's just I can into it that like America it's an American state which means it was settled which means there
were missionaries which means like all these people who obviously don't look like Europeans with like crosses on the
back of their vehicles like they lost chunks of who
they are as humans because of Christianity the mission missionaries and stuff like that and like I do love
Hawaii but like it's also I'm aware that it's kind of gross yeah totally there
was a thing where um no this is funny one one of the times when The Rock was on Satur Night Live they were like at a
luau and he was like making fun of people and he was like oh cool you're on your honeymoon that's great do you wear Crocs and restaurants in Nebraska it's
like so funny like what are you doing here yeah so John Adams was allowed to
stay he died at on pit Karen Island he's the he's buried there so he's the only
mutineer with a a grave like he's he's buried there the island is still a British oversea territory because of
course it is um it has a population of about 50 people and a lot of them are like descendants of the mutineers and a
lot of there are a fair amount of people in Tahiti that are descendants of you know these colonizers and these people
that came out there in 19 oh I don't know if I mentioned that when they got to pick the beginning they burned the
Bounty so they burned the boat so they wouldn't you know uh have it as like evidence of what they had done but in
1957 National Geographic Explorer Luis Martin found what remained of the bounty off the Island's East Coast so still
like parts of it that are that are under there that's yeah yeah that's it so I
feel like the red flags are don't be colonizers and don't treat your people like [ __ ] so that they overthrow you I
um I got I got to find this guy what are you looking for this
[ __ ] absolute [ __ ] loser [ __ ] dweeb John Allen
Chow who was all of 26 years old from scotsboro
Alabama what an absolute [ __ ] what you mean so like
so here's the thing like I again like I have no problem with people in their religious
practices I I growing up and having friends talk about how they're going to
go down and do a mission service in like Central America like [ __ ] you like who are you
to take their [ __ ] culture away from them like what because they don't
[ __ ] have you know stock portfolios they're less than you like what are you
trying to teach them like yeah it's so offensive and like you know what's funny is like okay not funny it's actually
kind of awful it's like I um I got on those weird rabit holes on YouTube and
the most recent one that I went down has to do with the Narco Wars and the Cartel Wars in Mexico and I've like had this
thought multiple times driv like dude these people are [ __ ] descendants of Aztec and Mayan
warriors and they're cutting each other's heads off over like $3 worth of
like weed yeah and it's just like and like and I try to like do the math in my head
of like how do you tie that back to missionaries and Catholics going over
there trying to convert them to Christ like it's all there I know it's there I need to think about it more but like it
is so [ __ ] up that people do that and they think it's a good thing there's just like no like this there's no
redeeming quality to this Mission you know like they were going to Tahiti to like take advantage of the women take
advantage of the culture to steal their food so that they could bring it to the West Indies to be able to really cheaply
feed their slaves like it's like all bad it's all bad it's all bad there's nothing ring about it I do want to say
that Anthony Hopkins does look kind of young in this oh he's 47 he does look I mean he looks the youngest I've ever seen him in this poster for the
Bounty do you remember when he played um the wolf no wait that was Jack Nicholson I mind Jack nichon played the wolf um
Jack Nicholson is doing terrible he like lives alone and is really really old but Anthony Hopkins his his Instagram is
like him playing the piano it's quite lovely God what even the locals told this [ __ ]
[ __ ] they said they wouldn't take him there We're Not Gonna Take You There they wouldn't take him they like dropped
him off was like this is as closest I'm getting the island he was like I can do it it's like why what is and I remember
I feel like his dad one time was like we shouldn't blame him you should 100% blame him he's a% blame him's [ __ ]
idiot and the people who enabled him all of his [ __ ] youth pastors and church leaders they can all [ __ ] bathe in
his blood because they're [ __ ] responsible for it too piece of [ __ ] yeah that story is terrible and I hope
those people on the island are doing fine yeah no kidding um I think I read
something else about them I don't know if this is true this is just a random possibly untrue story Corner that during like tsunami time when there was like a
big tsunami in like that area of like India and Japan or something people on that island were okay they survived
because they had the tribal knowledge literally to know that when the ocean gets pulled back like that they need to run to the hills yeah of course you know
like without any science or anything you know or whatever I'm sure they have something you know what I mean super cool don't go there so um so his dad
this guy's dad blamed his death his kids death on the missionary Community yeah
Fair 100% one of my really good friends I hate [ __ ] say this I wouldn't say her name but like when we were growing
up we went to high school together and she was like super super Christian and was like always going on these missions and I was just I remember as a kid being
like oh that's so cool you get to travel and it's like fun you get to help people and now as an adult I'm like that was
kind of [ __ ] up like that was kind of [ __ ] up I had someone at someone also
not say who it was like but they were like I got to go to South America and help people and I'm like no you didn't
that wasn't helping people are you you're out of your mind like that's absolutely not like no you went there to
like knock on doors and try to get them to be Mormon not it's a different thing
yeah so Taylor Taylor I think we shine later in the evening I think I think at
10: a.m. like I'm kind of barely half awake and at 8: a.m. you're 100% not awake and um I
think I think we shine man I think like later in the evening is maybe so Taylor
moved our time but she didn't actually know what Taylor didn't know when she moved our time was that I was desperately wishing that she would
because I landed at like 11:00 p.m. last night from Denver got to my house at
like midnight and then also had done almost no research for this episode so
the fact that she pushed it is uh was hugely beneficial for next week is going to be wild but let's talk about it
because I might I can maybe do it from the hotel wait where are you going
La wa why I have to go to I'm working from LA 24th to the 27th so I have to go
on Saturday CU I also have to work on Sunday which like a big project and then um but I have two baseball games at the
same time Saturday morning the end of noon I mean there's a chance we could do
it in person on Thursday yeah but I can't come until later because we have piano until
5:30 being a parent is hard you should tell we should end with that no no like
have Juan Juan's a driver we have dinner well [ __ ] it we'll order pizza at the at
the Cita and then we can just have some Bourbon and pizza and record all right
okay talk about it I hav um I don't know what I'm doing okay great thank you for everyone who um don't don't stop I have
to say thank you thank you everyone and also I figured out how to review on Spotify because my cousin Lindsay asked
me how to do that and I was like I don't know so I found out it's on the app only you can't leave words but you can do the
five stars 15 people already have so thank you so much please continue to tell your friends we have hopefully some
marketing plans coming soon that we'll talk about next week and we'll get out to more people but everybody thank you for your reviews um find us anywhere you
listen to podcasts also on YouTube as well and I got us a Twitter just for fun awesome thank you doom to Phil pod we're
on Twitter as well now we're on everything when we're famous we will not forget you the little people who helped
get us here we'll remember you our first thousand followers yay cuz right now now
there's like seven of you but I do think but we are we are going up and I'm very excited and happy to happy to do this so
great no we're wait Taylor we're way past that we're like we're like we have like over 1,200 1300 downloads no I know
but like does it mean but this the last one you need to
express positivity I did I just made something up and then I felt bad about it so I said something else no we have
in the last seven days we have 76 unique listeners which is great hello 76 of you
thank you than so thank you thank you all um and yeah we'll be joining you again next week either from Palm Springs
remotely in LA in Austin or some other way but also shout out to um Henry our
friend who's definitely listening because we have one down yeah we have one download in Portugal every week so
that could actually be the other friend I mentioned who did the mission mission trips [ __ ] that means that she might
hear this well there's one person in Portugal listening to us so we know two people there it could be it's probably
this friend it's probably not Henry Henry's not I don't know I thought I don't know anybody else in portol Henry
list is like Henry list is like M hack stuff like he tries to like improve himself as a
human he's lame two people in Jacksonville four people in Las Vegas
one person in Olympia Washington no way seriously yeah one person in Houston
one person in Rockport Texas oh that's the the new isfs that's the new gf's mom
one person in poosi Michigan do see new girlfriend's
mom yeah she told her mom about my podcast that's sweet two people in Grand
Rapids what up Kelly I know it's my friend from work anyway very exciting you should cut this all out
bye it's like have this podast guess I'm going to have to cut out cut it out
we've been here for days all right I'm going to stop recording thanks everyone
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